Josh gives a damn, Scarlett  —  How thrilled would you be if your girlfriend was hanging out with Wilmer Valderrama?  —  Probably about as thrilled as Josh Hartnett, who seemed a little anxious on Monday when the noted Hollywood swordsman flew Scarlett Johansson out to be with him in the Hamptons.

EXCLUSIVE: Suri Cruise Birth Certificate  —  TMZ has obtained a copy of the official birth certificate of the elusive Suri Cruise, daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes.  —  The document, filed with the Los Angeles County Register-Recorder/County Clerk, was filed May 8, 2006.  (Click on document to download.)

Kabbalah: is Madonna losing her religion?  —  Yes, say friends.  They believe the singer is about to cut ties with the sect to which she has given millions.  By Anthony Barnes  —  The pop world's most unusual partnership may be over.  Madonna and Kabbalah, the once obscure sect she championed …

The Devil Wears Teflon  —  "The Devil Wears Prada," a chic, not-so-veiled look at the fashion magazine world and its empress, Anna Wintour, depicts a demanding, occasionally toxic editor named Miranda Priestly who cares deeply about the semiotics of a particular choice of belts.

Depp's 'Pirates' Scores Record $132M Debut  —  Johnny Depp's boozy, woozy buccaneer Jack Sparrow has plundered the box office, with "Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest" taking in a record $132 million in its first three days, according to studio estimates Sunday.

Stand by your made man?  —  Wife bails - and tells all  —  You've seen the breakups and makeups of Tony and Carmela Soprano.  But, when it comes to romantic fury, the TV mob couple has nothing on Joe and Nancy Defede.  —  The Defedes are the real deal.  For four years, Joe was acting boss …

Lotsa Crowe-ing over baby  —  Proud dad Russell Crowe hit the airwaves yesterday to tell the world all about the birth of his second son, Tennyson.  —  Hours after his wife, Danielle Spencer, gave birth in Sydney, Crowe called a local radio station.  —  "Dani is great, mate, everybody is fine," the Oscar winner gushed.

Beyonce Knowles to play Bob Dylan  —  Beyoncé Knowles is on the shortlist to play grizzled protest singer Bob Dylan.  —  The 'Bootlicious' singer is one of several black female stars being considered to play Dylan in a biopic of his life after the director, Todd Haynes …

Survivor's Stephenie LaGrossa Gets Married  —  Ward and LaGrossa  —  Survivor: Palau and Guatemala castaway Stephenie LaGrossa wed her longtime boyfriend, high-school history teacher Michael Ward, 33, on Friday in Seaside Heights, N.J., the Jersey Shore town where they first met.

Bosworth And Bloom To Settle In Australia?.  —  Bosworth And Bloom To Settle In Australia?.  —  KATE BOSWORTH is planning to abandon her life in Los Angeles to live in Australia - where she hopes to settle down and have kids with partner ORLANDO BLOOM.  —  The SUPERMAN RETURNS beauty …

Brigitte Nielsen Weds Italian Beau - Again  —  Nielsen and Dessi  —  PHOTO BY: FOC KAN / WIREIMAGE.  —  Brigitte Nielsen married her fifth husband, Mattia Dessi, a former model from Italy, at the five-star Radisson SAS Golden Sands Resort & Spa in Malta on Saturday, PEOPLE has learned.

New Couple Alert!  —  If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends (or be really rich and famous).  —  Sources confirm exclusively to PerezHilton.com that former Spice Girl Melanie B.  (Scary Spice) and funny man Eddie Murphy are dating!  —  "They've been lying low and trying …

Lindsay Lohan dating Rhys Ifans?  —  Lindsay Lohan is allegedly romancing British actor Rhys Ifans.  —  The 'Mean Girls' actress is said to have fallen for the 37-year-old actor - best known for his role as Hugh Grant's eccentric flatmate Spike in 'Notting Hill' - after being introduced to him by her friend Kate Moss.

The Home Stretch  —  Howdy y'all ... today I'm coming to you from a Ramada Inn in Green River, Utah.  Yesterday was a very interesting day on the road and we are scheduled to arrive in LA this evening — as long as everything goes according to plan.  Deets on the drive are below ... let's get to the day's goss ...

WEEK AHEAD: Heidi's Runway Return  —  PHOTO BY: CARLEY MARGOLIS / FILMMAGIC  —  Heidi Klum searches for the next great designer on the third season of Project Runway, debuting on Wednesday.  PEOPLE looks at the supermodel's quest plus other events to watch for in the coming week:

Pamela Anderson takes her bikini to Monaco  —  Summer's just getting started so if you're already sick of seeing celebrities in bikinis this might not be your favorite place to be right now.  Same goes if you're not a fan of humongous breasts and seeing a woman scar her children for the rest …

Nicky Hilton to Open Hotel "Nicky O"  —  Nicky O. Oh?  —  Pretty soon (this November in fact), if you visit Miami's famed Ocean Drive, you might be able to stay in Nicky Hilton's newest business venture, Nicky O, a boutique chain of luxury hotels to open in Miami and Chicago.

Bosworth and Bloom Eye Marriage  —  HOLLYWOOD - Kate Bosworth and Orlando Bloom are considering marriage, although they have no plans to do so in the immediate future.  —  The Superman Returns actress has discussed tying the knot with Bloom.  —  She says, "It's certainly on the horizon.

Look Who's In Turnaround  —  Film projects, some with major talent attached, are now getting their plugs pulled by budget-skittish studios.  —  The real magic of Hollywood is not the knee-buckling resonance of a perfect screen kiss or the ability to conjure an army of Orcs from the plains of New Zealand.