Did Hasselhoff Make Phony Suicide Call?  —  David Hasselhoff lied to cops when he allegedly called 911 to report that his younger daughter attempted to commit suicide, according to his estranged wife, Pamela Bach.  And Bach tells TMZ Hasselhoff made the call out of pure revenge.

Looks Like Fergie's Solo Career Is "Hair" To Stay  —  Here's Fergie and her hairy armpits at the release party for her latest album "The Dutchess".  I would like to apologize to Fergie in advance for posting this since I know she hates when bloggers write about her... but this is absolutely gross.

Dad is Lohan down the law  —  LINDSAY LOHAN'S jailbird dad has sent an astonishing open letter to The Sun - in a desperate bid to heal the rift with his estranged daughter.  —  Irish-born Michael Lohan's moving, hand-written text sheds light on the bizarre private life of the stunning actress …

Kate and Pete 'could marry within weeks'  —  Kate Moss could marry troubled singer Pete Doherty within weeks, according to reports.  —  The supermodel said yes to Doherty after he proposed to her during a stroll in the grounds of the Priory Clinic last week, where he is being treated …

Janet Jackson: I Don't Talk to Justin  —  Janet Jackson hasn't spoken to Justin Timberlake since the infamous "wardrobe malfunction" at the 2004 Super Bowl - but she plans to reconcile with him in her own time, she revealed on The Oprah Winfrey Show Monday.  —  "We haven't spoken.

Scarlett Johansson gets scandalous waxings  —  Page Six reports that sources from DaTommaso restaurant say Scarlett Johansson was a nervous wreck before getting her first Brazilian waxing at the Oasis Day Spa and that the waxing crew "couldn't stop admiring her body."

"Laguna Beach" Star Arrested ... Again  —  For the second time this month, "Laguna Beach" star Jason Wahler has been arrested.  As Perez Hilton first reported, the LAPD arrested Wahler on Friday at 5:30PM for misdemeanor battery and set his bail at $20,000.  According to LAPD documents, he was released Saturday afternoon.

The Highest Form Of Flattery  —  Well ... I'm mostly rested and back to normal ... but I'm still in NYC which means that I have to deal with another 6-hour flight back to LA tonight and deal with yet another time change.  Fun times!  Let's get to the day's post ...

Kate Beckinsale Takes out the Fug  —  I don't know what's going on today, but it seems to be fast on it's way to becoming International Fug Day.  First, we had Scarlett Johansson in a terrible grey jump suit, and now we Kate Beckinsale wearing what appears to be a satin garbage bag.

The Fug is Strong with Scarlett Johansson  —  If there is some all-powerful Force, from which all beings derive their fashion sense, Scarlett Johansson's midichlorian count is definitely low.  Maybe Scarlett's stylist has turned to the Dark Side, but whatever the reason, the Fashion Force is definitely not with her.

Fashion Police: Taking Out the Trash Edition  —  Scarlett Johansson models the latest in custodian-chic, while Kate Beckinsale proves that she would look beautiful even wearing a Hefty Cinch Sak.

GEORGE MICHAEL TOUR LAUNCHES WITH POP AT BUSH  —  A mature, modest and (almost) scandal-free George Michael took the stage in his first solo concert in 15 years.  But the pop star couldn't resist making another controversial dig at George Bush.  —  At the end of the first set Michael sang …

Steven Tyler bounces back from hep C  —  Aerosmith's Steven Tyler has been secretly battling hepatitis C — a serious viral infection of the blood, often associated with dirty needles, that can lead to chronic liver disease.  —  But the 58-year-old recovering drug addict tells "Access Hollywood's" …

Happy Birthday Tom's Mom  —  Say what you will about Tom Cruise, the guy takes time out for his mama.  —  TomKat, with Tom's kids Isabella and Connor in tow, took Tom's mom to dinner in Las Vegas for her 70th birthday.  The family enjoyed a nice relaxing meal outside on the patio …

Aaron Carter's Engagement Is Over  —  Singer Aaron Carter has called off his engagement to Playboy model Kari Ann Peniche after just six days, PEOPLE has confirmed.  —  Peniche tells PEOPLE she and the House of Carters star made the "mutual decision" on Friday.

Kimbo Stewart is in the Running for the Worst Implants Ever!  —  When your tits look like they belong in a fruit salad rather than your chest, you know you have a problem.  Kimbo Stewart seriously has breast implants that you could put an interstate through and a toll booth!

Cynthia Nixon: Why I Love Vagina!  —  For the first time since coming out as a lesbian, Cynthia Nixon is speaking publicly about her Sapphic ways.  —  In a new interview, the former Sex & The City star proclaims:  —  "I never felt like there was an unconscious part of me that woke up or that came out of the closet.

LederHOsen  —  Parasite Hilton is currently in Germany to attend Oktoberfest, hawk her failed album and also promote Rich Prosecco, a drink she is endorsing.  She donned a traditional Dirndl costume at a press conference for the beverage today.  —  She told photographers that she loves her dress …

I've Missed Me Some Hart!  —  Melissa Joan Hart will always share a place in my cold, black heart.  Why?  She is like forever 1996 to me.  Everytime I see recent pictures of her I can't NOT think about Beverly Hills 90210, How Do You Talk to an Angel, chokers, mary janes and floral dresses.

J. Lo Drops The Firm's Kwatinetz As Manager  —  TMZ has learned exclusively that Jennifer Lopez parted ways over the weekend with her manager of over a year, Hollywood heavyweight Jeff Kwatinetz, head of management company The Firm.  —  The actress-singer-fashion icon's last year has been less …

Oprah Winfrey's Radio Station Debuts  —  You can add radio to Oprah Winfrey's media empire: The TV host's new Oprah & Friends channel debuted at 10 a.m. Monday on XM Satellite Radio.  —  Airing on XM channel 156, Oprah & Friends will feature original programming from Winfrey's Harpo Productions …

Federline puts 'PopoZao' behind him  —  Plus: DMX feels violated, Hasselhoff wants in on 'Knight Rider' movie  —  Kevin Federline has kicked women's behinds — off his new album.  —  The aspiring rapper's debut CD "Playing With Fire" hits shelves on Halloween, but his much-derided ode …