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5:55 PM ET, May 9, 2007

WeSmirch

 Top News: 
TMZ.com:
Paris — I'm Not Above the Law  —  Paris Hilton has issued the following statement through attorney Richard Hutton:
RELATED:
Andrei Harmsworth / Metro.co.uk:
Banned Paris back behind the wheel  —  Paris Hilton has taken the meaning of 'dumb blonde' to unimaginable new heights, after she was pictured behind the wheel of her car just days after being handed a jail sentence for violating a driving ban.  —  The soon-to-be jail bird was snapped driving …
TMZ.com:
Paris — Blame It on the Messenger?  —  TMZ has learned that Paris Hilton has seen a new lawyer in a desperate attempt to save her ass.  —  Hilton has already retained famed criminal defense lawyer Howard Weitzman.  Yesterday, she met with celeb DUI lawyer Richard Hutton.
Ken Lee / People.com:   Why Is Paris Hilton Still Driving?
popbytes:   INSIDE PARIS HILTON'S PRISON HELL!
New York Post:
LINDSAY'S MOM HOGS SPOTLIGHT  —  DINA Lohan, a former Radio City Rockette, is riding the coattails of daughter Lindsay Lohan to launch a TV career.  —  The leggy 44-year-old mother of three was hired by "Entertainment Tonight" to interview celebrities on the red carpet as they arrived …
RELATED:
Jeffrey Slonim / People.com:   Georgia Rule Director: 'Tough Love' for Lindsay Lohan
Jeannette Walls / MSNBC:
K-Fed disses Britney's latest rehab romance  —  Plus: Bounty hunter lands in doghouse, thanks to his wife  —  Kevin Federline has been talking trash about Britney Spears' new man, musician Howie Day.  —  "When Kevin heard they had a sleepover at her house, everyone wanted to know about it," a source tells the new issue of Star.
RELATED:
TMZ.com:
Britney's Rehab Boy Trashed by K-Fed  —  Kevin Federline, amazingly enough, is calling Britney Spears' boytoy Howie Day "trash," and adds that Britney had to "head to the dump" to meet Day while in rehab.  —  K-Fed's slam came when he heard, reports Star (via MSNBC), that his ex had a sleepover …
Discussion: Snarky Gossip
New York Post:
TROPICAL HOLIDAY  —  THE recent tryst in Turks and Caicos was just a quick getaway for Josh Hartnett and Penelope Cruz.  Since the vacation, the two have been getting cozy with other celebs.  Star magazine reported Penelope took her crew to Lenny Kravitz's TriBeCa apartment after her April 28 birthday party at the Beatrice Inn.
RELATED:
J. Harvey / A Socialite's Life:
Penelope and Josh Must Not Have Had A Good Time  —  Penelope Cruz and Josh Hartnett returned from a tropical vacation together - and promptly started banging other people .  I wonder what happened in Turks & Caicos?  She's on to Lenny Kravtiz now.  Supposedly they're just old friends.
Roger Friedman / Fox News:
George Lucas Calls 'Spider-Man 3' Silly; Cate Blanchett Looks Great  —  George Lucas Calls 'Spider-Man 3' Silly  —  Before I tell you what George Lucas said at the all-star Time magazine dinner for the 100 most influential people, let's cut to the chase: Cate Blanchett arrived and looked gorgeous.
Noelle Hancock / Us Weekly:
Ricki Lake: How I Lost Over 100 lbs  —  Once weighing 250 pounds, newly transformed former talk show host Ricki Lake has revealed exclusively to Us Weekly the secrets behind her 123-pound, size-4 shape.  —  Lake, 38, who just debuted The Business of Being Born, her documentary about home birth …
The Post Chronicle:
Britney Spears' New Man Howie Day "Trash" Says Kevin Federline  —  Britney Spears' new man has allegedly been branded "trash" by Kevin Federline.  The estranged husband of the 'Toxic' singer was reportedly unimpressed when he heard Howie Day had spent the night at Britney's house.
RELATED:
A Socialite's Life:   Britney Likes a Fixer-Upper
TMZ.com:
Don't Mess With Nick Lachey!  —  Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo had a run-in on Friday night at a pre-Kentucky derby party with a guy who was not so representative of Southern hospitality.  —  According to Nick (via his reps), the couple were making their way through the party at Club Felt …
Discussion: Ballz! and poponthepop.com
Noelle Hancock / Us Weekly:
Angelina Breaks Down in Prague  —  Photographers are a fixture in Angelina Jolie's everyday life, but on the evening of May 5 one paparazzo went too far.  —  As Jolie and her family (including boyfriend Brad Pitt, 43, and their four kids) were unwinding in their rented three-story home …
Daily Mail:
Daughter's illness spurs Johnny Depp to finally marry Vanessa Paradis  —  Actor Johnny Depp is set to wed long-term girlfriend Vanessa Paradis this summer.  —  The couple have toyed with the idea in the past but their daughter Lily-Rose's recent illness has 'spurred them into action', according to a source.
Hollywoodtuna:
Carmen Electra Will Teach You How To Be Sexy  —  It turns out that writing is among Carmen Electra's numerous talents.  Yes folks, she's put out a book.  The subject matter of this masterpiece shouldn't be much of a surprise.  It's a 'how to' book on being sexy.
Discussion: Buzznet Music …
Michael K / Dlisted:
Posh Needs to Pay Her Bills  —  Posh Beckham wasn't a happy shopper when three of her credit cards got denied at Abercrombie & Fitch at the Grove in Los Angeles.  Posh was trying to be $12,000 worth of stuff!  Is that even possible?!  How many board shorts and badly made hoodies do you need?!
Claire Bates / Daily Mail:
Blond Beckham shaves his head  —  Another week, another hairdo for David Beckham.  It seems he just couldn't put up with his blonde locks any longer and shaved it all off in one dramatic session at the hairdressers.  —  Now just a dull blonde fuzz covers Beckham's head.
Discussion: Dlisted
New York Post:
SECRET'S OUT  —  SPOILER alert!  If you don't want to know who wins this season of "The Bachelor," stop right now.  Naval officer Andy Baldwin has narrowed the field of women down to three lucky ladies, but one contestant, Tessa, 26, a social worker from San Francisco …
Michael K / Dlisted:
Naomi Campbell Loves to Sweep  —  Naomi Campbell kept a diary while performing community service and those entries have been published in the new issue of W Magazine.  The photos of her all dressed up going to work are also in the magazine.  —  Naomi said sweeping was one of her favorite chores.
Discussion: crunk and disorderly
Just Jared:
Becks is Bald!  —  David Beckham shows off his newly shorn look on the field during practice with soccer team Real Madrid on Wednesday morning.  —  His teammates took a liking to his new hairstyle — Brazilian midfielder Emerson even touched Becks' shaved head during practice!
 
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 More News: 
Michael K / Dlisted:
She Didn't Write That  —  Parasite Hilton has issued …
A Socialite's Life:
Paris Already Getting Threats from Inmates
Beth Campbell / Associated Press:
O.J. Tossed From Steakhouse on Derby Eve
David Bauder / Associated Press:
Nielsens: Real Bad Week for Katie Couric
Discussion: Jossip
Michael K / Dlisted:
Which Retro TV Show Will Robert Rodriguez Ruin?
Discussion: ComingSoon.net
Phil / Egotastic!:
Petra Nemcova's Breast Comes Close
 Earlier Picks: 
John Springer / MSNBC.com:
Diaz: Timberlake kiss 'no big deal'
Discussion: People.com
VH1:
Jermaine Dupri Says Janet Will Switch Labels, Be On 'Rush Hour 3' LP
Daily Mail:
Singer Amy reveals she's a toothless wonder
FemaleFirst:
Britney Spears' Monroe duet
Ben Widdicombe / NY Daily News:
Grace-less Court TV