Candy to Joe Francis: Cry Me a River  —  As the headlines about you changed — to scream "imprisoned" and "U.S. marshals" instead of "filmmaker" and "entrepreneur," you respond by crying, wailing and seeing yourself as a victim.  Bad move.  Today's headlines call you a "crybaby."  —  You blew it, Joe.

Jessica Simpson Says She's 'Very Happy' Post-Split  —  The same day that news broke of her split from John Mayer, Jessica Simpson says she's "very happy."  —  Asked by PEOPLE about the split at the Cannes Film Festival on Friday, Simpson replied: "I am very happy, but I don't really want to talk …

'METHOD' MELLOW IN POT BUST  —  Grammy Award-winning rapper Method Man lived up to his stage name - Staten Island slang for marijuana - when he was busted by a toll-booth cop for smoking a blunt, police said yesterday.  —  Method Man, a k a Clifford Smith, 'fessed up to carrying about 28 grams …

Rebecca Romijn's Strange Fan Mail  —  Strange fan mail is part and parcel of everyday life if you are a celebrity.  —  But stunner Rebecca Romijn has revealed that one particular admirer got a bit too friendly.  —  Talking on TV she told US chat show host CONAN O'BRIEN …

Paris plans to pen jail diary  —  PARIS HILTON is to pen a prison diary — and hopes it will make her millions.  —  The heiress, 26, plans to sell the blow-by-blow account after she serves her 23-day sentence for driving while banned.  —  A source said: "There will be details of clashes with prisoners and disgusting meals.

I am addicted to drugs, says George Michael  —  George Michael has admitted being addicted to prescription drugs, and said he believes the world would be a better place if more people smoked marijuana.  —  The troubled pop singer, who earlier his month pleaded guilty to driving while unfit through drugs …

X17 XCLUSIVE: Britney Takes Off For Orlando!  —  Our cameramen were staking out the airport yesterday, waiting for Ms. Spears to show up and look who turned up!  Here she comes, Orlando - Britney's on her way, and she's bringing eleven to fifteen all-killer no-filler minutes' worth of concert action with her!

Us Exclusive: Amy Winehouse Weds  —  Amy Winehouse said "Yes, yes, yes!"  The singer married fiancé Blake Fielder-Civil on Friday in Miami Beach, her rep confirms to Usmagazine.com.  —  "Amy Winehouse did get married to fiancé Blake Fielder-Civil this morning in a very private, intimate ceremony.

PARIS & NICOLE DO 'HARPER'S BAZAAR'  —  Talk about poetic justice!  —  'Simple Life' stars Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie pose as prison-bound jewelry thieves in the June issue of Harper's Bazaar.  —  At least they got the first part right!  —  Paris on why she frequently gets pulled over …

Only Pamela Anderson Can Dress Like This at an Airport  —  Pamela Anderson wears heels after a long flight from L.A to France.  —  Everything is made into a dress if it's short enough.  —  She has enough energy to sign autographs.  —  Next entry: Rag Links Previous entry: Britney Spears Returns to the 90's

Johnny Depp & Keith Richards on Rolling Stone  —  In preparation for the release of Pirates of the Carribean 3, Johnny Depp and musician Keith Richards are on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine.  Keith Richards actually plays Jack Sparrow's dad in the movie, and as most of us know, Johnny based the character on him.

HEY, JUDE, DON'T MAKE IT BAD  —  Jude Law is riding the wave of tears spewed forth by Jessica Alba in this month's GQ by saying that he, also, is too good looking to succeed in Hollywood.  Said Jude, "I'm only wanted by directors for the image I give off, and it makes me angry.

Lindsay Lohan @ Chanel Cruise Show 2007/8  —  Designer Karl Lagerfeld keeps rocker chic Lindsay Lohan close to the vest at the 2007/8 Chanel Cruise Show on Friday at Santa Monica Airport Hangar 8 in Calif.  —  La Lohan donned a sheer black minidress with a sequined bodice to the swank event.

Britney's bad hair day...again  —  Oops!  She really has done it again and sent a shiver down the spine of every hairdresser in the land.  Perhaps Britney Spears should stick to wearing her cowboy hat because her hair extensions look a horrible mess.  We can't understand why she doesn't show off …

Dita Von Teese Upskirt Pictures  —  These Dita Von Teese upskirt pictures are brought to you by the letter Q, the number 7, and the lack of anything else worth writing about.  I'm not sure if a Dita Von Teese upskirt is really that note-worthy, since she is a burlesque performer, after all, but it's not like I'm going to pass on it.