COMIC CLOBBERS COMIC IN L.A.  —  IT was fight night at an L.A. comedy club last week when Jon Lovitz roughed up Andy Dick over the murder of their "Saturday Night Live" colleague, Phil Hartman.  —  Laugh Factory owner Jamie Masada, who witnessed the assault, said, "Jon picked Andy up by the head …

Britney Spears to Host Las Vegas Club Opening  —  Britney Spears, a fixture on the Los Angeles club scene, will host the opening of LAX nightclub in Las Vegas next month, a club rep tells PEOPLE.  —  LAX, whose investors include Christina Aguilera and Nicole Richie's former fiancé DJ AM, opens Aug. 31 in the Luxor Hotel.

Paris Singing a New Tune...or 10  —  RECOMMENDED (0)  —  Less than a month removed from her sojourn in a Los Angeles lockup, Paris Hilton is itching to make the transition from jailbird to songbird.  —  "I'm already working on my new record," Hilton tells E! Online.

SPECIAL STRESS  —  ALL'S not well with Gisele Bundchen and Tom Brady.  While the two have put up a happy front for the cameras - and his family is even said to be flying out to Italy to spend time at the villa in Rome she recently acquired - our spies say Bundchen is upset that Brady's ex …

Katie Holmes Pregnant With Baby No.2?  —  She's snapped with tell-tale baby bump...  RSS Feeds  —  YOUR SHOUTS:  —  Katie Holmes sparked another round of pregnancy rumours when she arrived at the L.A. premiere of Hairspray in a clingy little black dress that revealed what looked like the beginnings of a baby bump.

Beckham may delay debut; Capello considers U.S. job  —  Injury may force soccer star to sit out Galaxy's game Saturday, and former Real Madrid coach says he has received an offer to coach in the U.S.  —  The rapidly unfolding David Beckham story took a couple of new twists Monday, one of them expected, the other somewhat surprising.

Tyler suits Paris to a tee  —  If it's Monday, Paris Hilton must have a new fella.  —  The next lucky passenger on the Valtrex express is Tyler Atkins, a 21-year-old T-shirt designer.  His label, Rock Stars and Angels, is available in trendy L.A. boutiques like Kitson.

Painfully thin Amy is shortlisted for Mercury Music Prize  —  Loved-up singer Amy Winehouse is pictured a shadow of her former self on the day she should have been celebrating her nomination for the Mercury Music Prize.  —  The star's once curvy figure has been reduced to just skin and protruding bone.

Dave Chappelle — I'm So F**king Tired, Bitch!  —  TMZ has confirmed Dave Chappelle went to the hospital this past weekend because he was wacked out.  But Chappelle's rep told TMZ any wackiness was due to exhaustion — not drugs.  —  The rep says Dave went to the emergency room for "physical exhaustion."

Victoria Beckham threatens Eddie Murphy  —  Victoria Beckham was recently interviewed by Contact Music as part of her massive "We've Moved" press tour, which the Beckhams are doing instead of sending out change of address cards to their friends and family.  Victoria's new reality special is called …

Lance Bass Recalls First Encounter with New Beau  —  Connecting with new boyfriend Pedro Andrade was a real high for Lance Bass: He first spotted him 35,000 feet up in the air.  —  "He was asleep in the back of the plane on the way over," the former 'N Sync star said of the Brazilian model …

Kirsten Dunst Needs a Bra... And Some Make Up... And a Shower  —  Wow!  Kirsten Dunst looks like ass.  And not the good kind of ass.  The bad kind.  We've seen her looking rough before, and frankly, her looks have been going downhill for a long time, but it's never been this bad.

A Tara Reid Beach Solution: One Piece Bathing Suit!  —  I don't have anything against Tara Reid.  In fact, I actually like her.  But as a professional babe critic, I think she needs a one piece bathing suit.  Sure it's not as sexy as a bikini but having what looks like melted skin on your stomach isn't either.

Sting ordered to pay $51,000 to ex-chef  —  LONDON - An employment tribunal ordered Sting and his wife, Trudie Styler, on Tuesday to pay a former chef $51,000 in compensation after she won a sexual-discrimination claim against them.  —  Jane Martin, 41, won her claim in May.

Zac Efron: It Always Clicked With Vanessa  —  Zac Efron says that the on-screen chemistry between himself and Vanessa Hudgens was apparent as early as the casting sessions for their hit, High School Musical.  —  "For all of the partner things, me and Vanessa always got paired up," Efron …

A Different Kind of Bling: Bracelet Tracks Alcohol Consumption  —  Monitoring Device Like Lohan's Samples Sweat, Records Ethanol Levels  —  Strapping on stiletto heels just got a little bit harder for celebrity starlet Lindsay Lohan.  —  Lohan is now donning an alcohol-monitoring ankle bracelet along …

Lily Allen Has More Nipples Than You  —  Pop star Lily Allen used her recent appearance on the British version of "Saturday Night Live" to reveal to the world that she's blessed — with a third nipple.  Does that make you randy?  —  Lily was part of a sketch when someone just happened to mention a third nipple.

David Goes For The Goal  —  Uh, guys, what's going on here?  We smell a publicity stunt!  The Beckhams attended an event at CAA in Century City last night before heading off to a romantic dinner at The Little Door restaurant on 3rd street.  But then on their way back into that sexy, svelte car, this happened.