Britney Leaves Class, Teaches Paps A Lesson  —  After a long day at school, Britney Spears wasn't particularly pleased to see the paparazzi - especially the ones jumping out in front of her car!  Then again, given her automotive luck lately, we can't really blame her for calling …

ANGELINA JOLIE & HER 'LIES'  —  good morning!  this week's STAR magazine hops back on the brangelina express featuring angelina jolie's supposed lies about a number of things including her future with brad pitt - we all know by now i'm huge fan of ms. jolie (and ms. aniston) …

Jessica Biel Is A Dumbass  —  Jessica Biel left a yoga studio in Santa Monica today and instead of heading right to her car, dumb bitch created a scene.  She started shouting at the paps to "not get close to her" and "to get a real job."  She apparently tried to hit one of them with her umbrella.

$2M up magician David Copperfield's sleeve?  —  Nothing makes a problem disappear faster than money.  But did David Copperfield really offer a Seattle woman $2 million if she'd drop her rape charge against him?  —  The famed illusionist allegedly promised that much in cash to his accuser …

Diddy on J.Lo: "I Will Be Sending Expensive God-Daddy Gifts"  —  While Jennifer Lopez continues to keep mum about her pregnancy, ex-boyfriend Diddy is happy to talk to Usmagazine.com about it.  —  "She's going to make a great mother," he told Us Wednesday at a press conference promoting Ciroc Vodka.

Posh stops traffic in a 'zebra crossing' dress  —  Approach with caution!  Self-appointed fashionista Victoria Beckham stepped out in London last night wearing a figure-hugging dress that looked to be inspired by a zebra crossing.  —  Already accustomed to stopping traffic …

Diddy Speaks Out: 'I Don't Fight Over Girls!'  —  Sean "Diddy" Combs wants to set the record straight on claims he assaulted a man at a New York City nightclub earlier this month.  —  "It was something that was just totally overblown ... I don't fight over girls!"

Suri Shows off Fancy Hairdo, Jacket and Bottles  —  The most adorable little Suri ev-ver brought her two bottles and mom Katie to the Berlin Zoo yesterday afternoon.  Double fisting already?  Atta girl.  Last week the family took a break from the German adventure to stop off …

ELLEN AND PORTIA HEADED TO SPLITSVILLE?  —  Could it be?!  Are Star staffers and their anonymous sources right when they allege Ellen's breakdown last week stemmed from domestic havoc?  From the current issue, which hit stands today. … Our worlds are crumbling.

UNLIKELY BEATLE EX-WIFE  —  HEATHER Mills wants to be played by Reese Witherspoon in the movie of her life, but she wants an unknown to play Paul McCartney, 65.  Britain's Daily Mail reports Mills, 39, flew to L.A. this week for meetings on the biopic, which had been shelved while she was negotiating …

Lindsay's Lookin' Smokin'!  —  To be fair, Lindsay's fineness is hardly news at this point - but this is one story we're always glad to revisit!  We spotted the Cirque Lodge's most famous graduate puffing away on a cigarette at Pit Fire Pizza after a long day of practicing at the Millennium Dance Studio yesterday afternoon.

LOVERS' TOAST  —  "GOSSIP Girl" star Chace Crawford wined and dined his Southern-bred gal Carrie Underwood Tuesday night . . . well into yesterday morning.  The couple dropped into Southern Hospitality to hear a set by the legendary David Allan Coe, after Crawford...

Evan Rachel Wood to sign with Interscope Records  —  Sources say actress Evan Rachel Wood, best known for her dramatic performances on film (Thirteen, The Upside of Anger), television (Once and Again), and as Marilyn Manson's girlfriend (see her starring role in his steamy, slightly NSFW …

Natalie Portman: 'I Won't Do Nude Scenes Again'  —  Actress talks about her awkwardness while baring all for new film...  Natalie Portman has said she will never get naked again on the big screen after regretting a nude scene in her new short film Hotel Chevalier.

SOUTH BEACH BITE  —  MICHAEL Vick may have had to sell off his multimillion-dollar digs in Georgia, but the disgraced, dog-fighting NFL-er just bought a pricey pad in the luxurious Philippe Starck high-rise Icon South Beach.  A Miami neighbor tells us: "[Vick] has bought [an] apartment.

Tom Cruise Gets Mushy About Wedding Anniversary  —  As his one-year wedding anniversary approaches, Tom Cruise is reflecting on the day he married Katie Holmes in a castle in Italy.  —  Asked what stands out in his memory about the wedding last November, Cruise said that watching Holmes become a bride is the most prominent.