ALL THE BRITNEY'S A STAGE  —  Britney Spears is in cahoots with the paparazzi to make sure her every move is chronicled on camera, a top snapper says.  Lensman Alison Silva tells celebrity private eye Paul Barresi: “Britney is in on it.  [She] calls the paparazzi before she goes out.

Sexually Transmitted Diseases  —  Any hot feelings I ever felt for Jared Leto are officially gone now.  He's gone to the skank side.  In Paris Hilton's defense, I'm pretty sure this is how she greets everyone.  You should see how she says “goodbye."  It involves lots of licking of the chode.

Winehouse Checks Into Rehab — Yes, Yes, Yes!  —  Finally!  It looks like the brunette turbo trainwreck is gonna slow down — Amy Winehouse has checked into rehab, according to The Sun.  Blondes do have more fun!  The singer left her home in London this afternoon to enter the Edward House private rehabilitation clinic.

Mariah Pops Her Top  —  Mariah Carey, 37, isn't shy when it comes to revealing her body.  And why should she be?  —  Mimi was spotted topless on the beaches of the Caribbean yesterday, sporting a skimpy little bikini bottom and carrying a well-placed magazine.  Crap — she picked a lousy time to learn how to read.

Why I detest Burt Reynolds and Nicolas Cage by Kathleen Turner  —  Kathleen Turner made her name as a screen femme fatale in the classic thriller Body Heat.  Her new autobiography reveals with unflinching honesty how crippling illness and the pressures of fame tipped her into alcoholism and despair.

Oscar noms announced as strike shadow hovers  —  ‘Atonement,’ ‘Juno,’ ‘Michael Clayton,’ ‘No Country’ and ‘Blood’ are the best picture nominees.  —  “Atonement,” “Juno,” “Michael Clayton,” “No Country for Old Men” and “There Will Be Blood” were nominated this morning for the Academy Award for best picture of 2007.

Paris Gives Letterman Another Shot  —  Remember the last time Paris Hilton went to see David Letterman?  He asked about her stint in the slammer — and she wasn't too stoked about it.  —  But TMZ has learned that Dave's getting another shot with Princess P, and that she'll be a guest on the show on Friday, Feb. 1.

Family, Friends Remember Brad Renfro at Funeral  —  Actor Brad Renfro, who died last Tuesday at age 25, was remembered by family and friends at a funeral and memorial service Monday night in his hometown of Knoxville, Tennessee.  —  An arrangement of red, white and yellow flowers adorned the closed casket …

Madonna's mystery ‘black eye’ prompts renewed speculation of plastic surgery  —  Superstar Madonna's penchant for wearing sunglasses at night may at first seem impractical - but on closer inspection it appears they have a more prqactical use.  —  The singer appeared to be hiding a big fat bruise …

An Off the Market Scarlett Does Her Civic Duty  —  1 hour 23 min ago by PopSugar 1,519 Views … Scarlett Johansson provided a breath of fresh air and a taste of home for about 600 marines stationed in Kuwait on Sunday.  Unsurprisingly, the men lined up to catch a glimpse of the actress …

A Special Day for Christina's Baby  —  While he'll never remember it, Jan. 20, 2008, was one of the more important days in the life of Christina Aguilera's newborn son.  According to a report on Eonline.com, the soulful singer and her husband Jordan Bratman celebrated little Max Liron Bratman's bris …

P Diddy wants fourth name change  —  P Diddy has revealed that he wants to be known as Sean John in the future.  —  The rapper - real name Sean Combs - changed his stage name from Puff Daddy to P Diddy in August 2005.  —  He later dropped the P and became Diddy, but is still widely referred to as P Diddy in the UK and New Zealand.

Any Excuse To Take His Shirt Off  —  David Beckham is making the most of his downtime.  —  The soccer stud took part in an impromptu soccer match at the roadside, in the Aberdeen neighbourhood of Sierra Leone's capital Freetown, during a visit this past weekend.

John Travolta and Kirstie Alley in Scientology indoctrination video  —  It just keeps getting better for Scientology.  Last week a ton of videos came out of Tom Cruise spouting their in-terminology and laughing maniacally.  The “church” tried to yank the videos off YouTube and wherever else …

New York Minute  —  Klassy Kid Rock rocked up — barefoot and in a Waffle House T-shirt — to the V.I.P. banquet of Michael Jordan's celebrity golf tournament Friday night at Atlantis in the Bahamas, where performers included the Pussycat Dolls, Ashanti and the O'Jays.