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1:55 AM ET, October 30, 2008

WeSmirch

 Top News: 
Virginia Wheeler / The Sun:
Marriage ‘contract’ controlled Guy's life  —  The document detailed how many dates the couple should go on and how often they should have sex.  —  It stated that Guy had to “work to enrich his wife's emotional and spiritual wellbeing” and ordered him to devote several hours a week to reading Kabbalah texts with Madge.
RELATED:
New York Post:
‘WILD’ JOE CALLED ‘DISGUSTING’  —  THE bitterness between Joe Francis and Samantha Ronson that erupted at the VMA Awards last month is getting worse.  On today's “Tyra Banks Show,” the “Girls Gone Wild” czar calls Lindsay Lohan's deejay girlfriend “very jealous.  Samantha tried to start a fight with me.
RELATED:
Providence Journal:
Lohan expected for Providence Halloween dinner
Discussion: OH NO!!
PopEater:   Joe Francis Fuels Feud With Sam Ronson
Hollywoodtuna:
Nicollette Sheridan's Sweet Old Lady Ass  —  Nicolette Sheridan is an old lady, it's as simple as that, she was banging dudes in the bathroom of Studio 54 before Tara Reid was even born and yet her ass looks like something Tara's little sister would do her pilates on.
Natalie Trombetta / Daily Mail:
Not again, David!  Rubberneck Becks eyes up more perky cheerleaders … David Beckham the ogler strikes again!  —  The football star was spotted soaking up the view from his front-row seats at an NBA game at the Staples Centre in Los Angeles yesterday.  —  While his favourite team …
RELATED:
Lisa Timmons / Socialite Life:
EXCLUSIVE: David Beckham Gets An Eyeful Of Laker Girl Booty
Michael K / Dlisted:
Jennifer Aniston Just Fainted  —  Finally!  Here's a cover that Jennifer Aniston can use to wallpaper her bathroom with.  I think she's going to make sweet love to this cover and try to have its babies.  —  In the new issue of Star Magazine, they claim Jenny Aniston has finally scored a point!
Cele|bitchy:
Jennifer Love Hewitt looks pregnant  —  Jennifer Love Hewitt was seen with a suspicious-looking lower belly protrusion (forgive the awkward word - I'm trying not to use the B word) at the Hollywood Film Festival Awards on Monday.  She wore a gorgeous red one-shoulder dress dress …
Michael K / Dlisted:
Kim From “The Real Housewives Of Atlanta” Is 30 Now  —  When Kim Zolciak of “The Real Housewives of Atlanta” proclaimed on the show that she was twenty-f**king-nine, television sets across America simultaneously received a huge load of various soft drink brands on their screens.
Britney Spears:
More Exclusive Britney Dance Photos!  —  Britney and her dance crew are really getting down to business!  Here are some exclusive new photos from a recent dance rehearsal — and they are HOT!  —  Britney is dancing around in a pair of boots and with a cane while her dancers move around her.
cityrag:
Best Celebrity Halloween Costumes  —  With this years celebrity Halloween costumes being failures.  We've concluded that hot is better than funny.  Proof from Isaac's kick ass list of the 25 Hottest Celebrity Costumes!  Click to enlarge...  Actually, no costume, is the best costume of all!
Discussion: Celebrity Smack!
Courtney Hazlett / MSNBC:
Brangelina clan requires six nannies  —  Plus: Richard Dreyfuss disses ‘W.’; Craig has doubts about another 007 film  —  Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie need six to eight nannies and a fleet of cars to keep their brood moving, says Life & Style magazine.  —  The Scoop  —  msnbc.com
Michael K / Dlisted:
Blind Items: I Guess....You Guess....  Which British female singer has such a bad BO problem, her poor entourage are forced to restrict their breathing to avoid inhaling her sweaty fumes?  (3AM Girls)  —  Most of you will probably guess Wino, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say Joss Stone?
Discussion: Gawker and OH NO!!
Michael K / Dlisted:
Slutty & Sluttier  —  Katie Price was once again out in London today whoring out her line of hair vibrators, pube irons and dirt star dryers.  —  Katie was obviously getting into the Halloween early spirit by wearing this fugly s**t out in public.  On the right side, she looks like a broke …
Discussion: OH NO!!
Starpulse:
Victoria Beckham To Run The New York Marathon  —  Spice World star Victoria Beckham is reportedly set to follow in her best pal Katie Holmes' footsteps and run the New York Marathon.  —  The former Spice Girl has allegedly been training in secret for the event in the Big Apple this Sunday.
New York Post:
‘VIEW’ TARGET  —  ELISABETH Hasselbeck gets more death threats than anyone else on “The View,” Whoopi Goldberg revealed Monday night at Cooper Union.  Whoopi - part of a panel discussion on Art and Educational Justice hosted by the Stella Adler Studio with Rosie Perez, Phylicia Rashad …
Michael Starr / New York Post:
‘SNL’ OVERHAUL  —  NO AMY?  ‘UPDATE’ WILL BECOME SETH-SUFFICIENT  —  Last updated: 2:17 pm  —  THE irreplaceable Amy Poehler will not be replaced on “Saturday Night Live.”  —  Seth Meyers, who co-anchors the show's centerpiece feature - “Weekend Update” - will be anchoring alone …
Discussion: Gawker and The Dish Rag
Jeffrey Slonim / People.com:
Jessica Simpson Bails on Date Night with Tony Romo  —  Jessica Simpson stood up two dates on Tuesday night - boyfriend Tony Romo and ... Elmo?  —  The singer - who designs clothing, shoes and handbags for Macy's - was supposed to fly from Nashville to New York Tuesday to celebrate the department store's 150th anniversary.
BBC:
David Tennant quits as Doctor Who  —  David Tennant talks about his time as the Doctor  —  David Tennant is to stand down as Doctor Who, after becoming one of the most popular Time Lords in the history of the BBC science fiction show.  —  Tennant stepped into the Tardis in 2005 …
Extra:
Thursday: Obama Exclusive!  —  The candidate is off the cuff with Mario Lopez — talking about his mother, and his workout.  Then, Sarah Palin the wild child!  The never before seen pictures of Palin in her party girl days.  Plus, Miley co-hosts the show!  Is she really leaving “Hannah Montana”?
Discussion: Evil Beet Gossip
Marc Malkin / E! Online:
Katy Perry: Death Becomes Her  —  Leave it to Katy Perry to celebrate her birthday with dead people.  —  The always-kooky “I Kissed a Girl” songstress marked the big 2-4 with a pre-Halloween costume bash last night at Siren Studios.  —  Guests were asked to come dressed as their favorite dead celebrity.
Discussion: iVillage
Hollywoodtuna:
WWE Divas Sexy Halloween Pictures  —  I don't do posts on WWE Divas very often.  Ever since Stacy Keibler left, I lost interest.  However, they have some new hotties there and they definitely know how to market them.  And what better way is there than dressing them up as little hot sluts for Halloween?
Allison Corneau / Us Weekly:
Denise Richards' Reality Show Returning for Second Season  —  Denise Richards is coming back to the small screen!  —  Her E! reality series, Denise Richards: It's Complicated, has been picked up for a second season, the network confirmed Wednesday.  —  An official network nod comes …
Discussion: Defamer
 
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 More News: 
Dave / TheBadandUgly.com:
First Look: Sherlock Holmes And Watson
Discussion: OH NO!! and FirstShowing.net
Borys Kit / Hollywood Reporter:
Tom Ford brings in three for ‘Single Man’
Associated Press:
Pap suing Keanu Reeves a fan of his films
Discussion: X17 Online and TMZ.com
Jonathan Landrum Jr / Associated Press:
Rapper T.I. votes despite being a convicted felon
Alyssa Shelasky / People.com:
Lil Wayne Gives a Hand in the Delivery Room
Discussion: Jezebel
Andrew Gans / playbill.com:
Cavenaugh, Scaglione, Olivo, Green and Akram to Lead Cast of West Side Story Revival
Discussion: Perez Hilton
 Earlier Picks: 
New York Post:
CLORIS MIGHT BE ‘YOUNG’ AGAIN
Discussion: WOW Report and New York Magazine
X17 Online:
Jennifer Hudson Fears For Her Safety, Goes Into Hiding
PEOPLE TV Watch:
REPORT: Melrose Place to Make a Comeback
Michael Ausiello / EW.com:
Ask Ausiello: Spoilers on 'Grey's Anatomy,' ‘Chuck,’ …
Discussion: Just Jared