Barack Obama jokes about Jessica Simpson  —  President Barack Obama was supposed to be featured on the cover of Us Weekly with his family, but found his face covered by Jessica Simpson.  In an interview with Matt Lauer, Obama jokes about the incident which proves the entire nation truly is captivated by her expanding ass.

Britney Will Cancel Tour If Kiddies Can't Come  —  Britney Spears will cancel her upcoming tour if K-Fed's lawyers continue to block an agreement allowing her to take the kids on the road — informed sources tell us.  —  Here's what we know.  For weeks, Britney, K-Fed and Jamie Spears …

‘Near Death’ Drama: Lindsay Lohan Stirs Trouble On Super Bowl Flight  —  Lindsay Lohan's frame isn't the only thing that's fading — it seems her star status is too.  —  The 22-year-old caused chaos while departing on a Delta Flight from Tampa, Fla. on Saturday morning when the airline …

Jessica Biel Throws Justin Timberlake Surprise B-Day Celebration  —  This is one birthday Justin Timberlake won't soon forget.  —  Jessica Biel, 26, threw her singer beau a Super Bowl-themed surprise birthday party in the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel's ultra-exclusive penthouse on Sunday afternoon, PEOPLE has learned.

Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and Suri Vacation in Brazil  —  Tom Cruise , Katie Holmes and their 2-year-old daughter Suri enjoyed a relaxing family beach vacation over the weekend in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.  —  After spotting the three on the beach (located in a military base), a small small crowd gathered around them.

Lisa Loeb, Roey Hershkovitz  —  Lisa Loeb, the singer and songwriter, and Roey Hershkovitz, the music coordinator on “Late Night with Conan O'Brien,” were married Saturday evening at Brasserie 8 ½, a restaurant in New York.  Rabbi Andy Bachman officiated.  —  Ms. Loeb, 40, is keeping her name.

Madonna fuels romance rumours after dinner date with Brazilian model … They haven't been photographed together for over a month, but this picture of Madonna and Brazilian model Jesus Luz will fuel speculation of a romance.  —  The singer, 50, left a restaurant with the 22-year-old in New York yesterday.

Megan Fox's Loves Her Ass And So Do I  —  Sometimes it's difficult to appreciate all of Megan Fox because her face is so captivating, but Megan has figured out that if she wears tight jeans with heart shape pockets on her ass, guys will realize she's not just another girl with a pretty face.

Jennifer Hudson pwned the National Anthem  —  If I may take off my jokester hat for a minute, as someone who watched the tragedy surrounding Jennifer Hudson pour across my daily tabloid reads I couldn't help but feel inspired by her performance of the National Anthem last night.

Michael Phelps Apologizes for Pot Pic  —  Michael Phelps has apologized after a controversial photo that apparently shows him inhaling from a marijuana pipe was published in a British newspaper Sunday.  —  “I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment,” …

MADONNA SHOWS OFF HER NEW TOY (BOY)  —  The ink is barely dry on Madonna's divorce papers, and already the Material Girl is parading her latest hunk around New York.  —  We caught up with Madge on a shopping spree in Manhattan.  And she had her rumored boy toy, Brazilian model Jesus Luz in tow to carry her bags.

Nick Lachey Loves Dating a Fellow Football Fanatic  —  Unlike other guys, Nick Lachey doesn't have to choose between sports night and date night.  —  “I'm a huge sports fan and she's a huge sports fan across the board, too,” Lachey, 35, tells PEOPLE of his girlfriend of over two years, Vanessa Minnillo.

A star reclaims her banner  —  Jennifer Hudson took a deep breath and she sang.  —  One hundred and ninety-five years after Francis Scott Key wrote “The Star-Spangled Banner,” Hudson redefined our national anthem last night as a statement of hope, faith and - yes - even a hint of defiance.