Roger Ebert: The Essential Man  —  It has been nearly four years since Roger Ebert lost his lower jaw and his ability to speak.  Now television's most famous movie critic is rarely seen and never heard, but his words have never stopped.  —  Read More at Roger Ebert's Journal >>

Jessica Simpson says stuff, too  —  Seen here over the years/when she was retarded hot, Jessica Simpson appears in the latest issue of Allure where she might as well have answered each question with “I'm completely oblivious to everything around me and sometimes a man's penis enters my vagina.”

Lady Gaga's Nearly Nude Brit Awards Performance (PHOTOS, VIDEO)  —  WHAT'S YOUR REACTION?  —  ***Scroll down for photos and video***  —  AP/Huffington Post:  —  LONDON - Flamboyant chanteuse Lady Gaga swept the U.K.'s Brit Awards Tuesday winning three categories and offering …

Fox411 Exclusive: JWOWW reveals neither she nor Snooki are Italian!  —  When MTV announced it was debuting a little television show called “Jersey Shore,” scores of Italian-Americans decried the program, claiming it promoted unhealthy ethnic stereotypes.  —  But in an appearance …

Kevin Eubanks Leaves ‘The Tonight Show!’  —  “Extra” has confirmed that Jay Leno's longtime bandleader and sidekick, Kevin Eubanks, is leaving “The Tonight Show,” as first reported by Lisa Stanley on K-EARTH 101.  —  A source tells “Extra” Eubanks “wanted a change” and decided to leave the show …

Chunks is gone  —  Basically, someone pretended to be a magazine editor and tricked Tila into thinking she had landed a photoshoot, only to cancel it for her “pregnancy” and replace her with Lady Gaga.  But then Tila ‘miscarried’ and sent this crazy ass emails to the “magazine editor” pleading for the job.

Oscar Spoilers: Best Original Song Artists Not Performing; But Contestants Invited From ‘So You Think You Can Dance?’  —  EXCLUSIVE: Oscarcast executive producers Adam Shankman and Bill Mechanic have dropped a bombshell, telling artists nominated for Best Original Song that they won't be invited …

Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Kourtney Kicks Scott to the Curb  —  Another week, another blow-up on Keeping Up with the Kardashians!  —  In part one of the show's season finale, Kris and Scott found themselves on familiar turf, butting heads yet again over his maturity level.

Beyonce's Dad Ordered to Pay Child Support  —  Beyonce's father, Mathew Knowles, has just been ordered to support baby Nixon, at least temporarily ... TMZ has learned.  —  An L.A. judge just ordered Knowles to pay $8,200 a month in child support, retroactive to February 1.

‘Supernatural’ exclusive: Eric Kripke stepping down as showrunner  —  Aw, hell.  I had a bad feeling Supernatural's early season 6 renewal came with an asterisk.  —  Sources confirm to me exclusively that creator Eric Kripke will be stepping down as the CW drama's day-to-day showrunner next season.

Lionel Richie Can't Wait to Walk Nicole Down the Aisle  —  With Lionel Richie as the father-of-the-bride, two things will likely occur at Nicole Richie's wedding to Joel Madden.  —  They'll party all night long.  —  People will be dancing on the ceiling.

SEXY NEW AD CAMPAIGN?  CHECK.  SERIOUS NEW FILM?  CHECK.  THIS YEAR MEGAN FOX PLANS TO PROVE TO THE WORLD THAT SHE'S A BOMBSHELL WITH CHOPS.  —  Megan Fox trudges onto a soundstage on the outskirts of Santa Fe, New Mexico, dressed like a college student: sweats, hiking boots and a puffy jacket …

Damaged goods: Lohan not invited to much of Fashion Week … EDITORS' PICKS … BEST OF NYDN.COM

Avril Lavigne and Brody Jenner: Hookup Alert  —  Avril Lavigne and Brody Jenner might be Hollywood's hottest new hookup.  —  Sources tell E! News that 25-year-old Lavigne and the Hills star have been seeing each other quietly over the last couple weeks.  —  “They're hooking up,” an insider said, “but they're keeping it low-key.”

EXCLUSIVE: Gossip Girl's Matthew Settle Splits with Wife  —  Spotted: Gossip Girl's Matthew Settle — with other women.  —  “Divorce is imminent,” a source says of the actor, 40, and his wife, model Naama Nativ (daughter Aven was born last March).  —  His wedding ring was off during NYC fashion shows February 11 and 12.

At size 4, Fashion Week model Coco Rocha, 21, is latest of many women considered fat by industry  —  What the ... ?  Coco Rocha says the demand for her modeling services has gone down because of her size-4 body.  —  So it's come to this.  —  After all the hype, promises and international outcry …

EXCLUSIVE: Crack Addiction Drove Charlie Sheen's Wife Brooke Mueller Into Rehab  —  Charlie Sheen's wife Brooke Mueller is in rehab for crack addiction, RadarOnline.com has learned exclusively.  —  “Brooke has been in denial about her problem for a long time,” one source close to her told RadarOnline.com.

Ewan McGregor: Filthy and Gorgeous  —  The Scottish actor has never been afraid to take chances, drop his trousers, or kiss a boy.  Now he comes clean.  —  Sydney, Ewan McGregor's sand-colored poodle mutt, is pooping on a well-kempt lawn in Los Angeles.  He eyes the horizon, birds chirp, and McGregor readies the bag.

Tiger Woods Huddles Over Return to Golf  —  Tiger Woods went from his home in Isleworth, Florida yesterday to the bungalow he owns in the same gated community for a meeting with officials from the Tavistock Cup to talk about his next tournament, sources tell TMZ.  —  The meeting took place midday.