Lindsay Lohan Fails Drug Test  —  Lindsay Lohan has failed a drug test in her criminal case ... TMZ has learned.  —  We're told the court-mandated drug test in question occurred last week.  According to the terms of Lindsay's probation, she will get 30 days in jail for a positive drug test.

Adam Lambert — Accused of Battery  —  TMZ has learned ... the Miami Beach Police Department is now in the middle of a violent incident involving “American Idol” runner-up Adam Lambert ... after the alleged victim filed a police report.  —  Law enforcement sources tell us the paparazzo seen grappling …

EXCLUSIVE: Octo-Mom Nadya Suleman Going On Welfare  —  With 14 children and no income, Octo-Mom is going on welfare.  —  Since giving birth to octuplets, Nadya Suleman has supported herself by selling access to her life, but a TV deal that she hoped would turn into a reality series fizzled.

Which Jersey Shore Star Is Stripping for Playboy?  —  She's got the bod, the boobs and the fame.  —  It's not wonder Playboy has been hot for JWoww.  —  So just how close is the Jersey Shore star to closing the deal to strip down for the mag—and just how undressed will she get?

LeAnn Rimes: My Affair Wasn't “Sloppy”  —  LeAnn Rimes is firing back at Wendy Williams after the daytime talk show host called her affair with Eddie Cibrian “sloppy.”  —  On her syndicated talk show Thursday, Williams, 46, discussed Rimes' recent Shape interview in which she justified why she cheated on husband Dean Sheremet.

Almost Famous  —  Remember that guy from The Hurt Locker, the badass you'd never seen before, who quietly dismantled car bombs and owned every inch of the screen?  That guy deserves an Oscar.  And he just might get it for his next act  —  “The first one, and the craziest one,” Jeremy Renner is saying, “was Sean Penn.

Sarah Palin To Appear at ‘Dancing with the Stars’  —  Sarah Palin will be in the audience to cheer on her daughter, Bristol, for Monday's season opener of “Dancing with the Stars” ... sources connected with the show tell TMZ.  —  Our spies say security has been “beefed up” for Sarah's appearance.

Documentary?  Better Call It Performance Art  —  CASEY AFFLECK wants to come clean.  —  His new movie, “I'm Still Here,” was performance.  Almost every bit of it.  Including Joaquin Phoenix's disturbing appearance on David Letterman's late-night show in 2009, Mr. Affleck said in a candid interview …

‘Big Bang Theory’ extends hiatus, Kaley Cuoco to miss ‘a few’ episodes  —  First the good news: Big Bang Theory star Kaley Cuoco is expected to make a full recovery in the wake of a weekend horseback-riding accident that left her with a fractured leg.  —  Now the bad news …

Look how edgy Lady Gaga was in high school  —  Lady Gaga in 2004  —  Look at the way she didn't fully zip up her Abercrombie & Fitch track jacket (her meat suit must have been at the cleaners).  She's pretty much screwed if a light breeze passes through.  But does she care?  Of course not!

Kelly Preston Marvels at Her ‘Terrific’ Pregnancy  —  Even with her late-fall due date swiftly approaching, Kelly Preston is not slowing down - with the glowing mom-to-be visiting Canada for one final public appearance before giving birth to a baby boy.  —  “It's been very easy and so wonderful …

Paris Hilton Adopts 20 Bunnies  —  More pets for Paris.  —  The 29-year-old heiress has Twittered that she recently walked into a pet shot and was shocked to learn that several rabbits would become food for snakes.  —  “I had to save them,” she wrote.  “I rescued 20 of them.

Kim Kardashian Blows Up Over ‘Filthy’ Sex Doll  —  Kim Kardashian claims she's been violated by an inflatable sex doll ... one that looks suspiciously like her ... and even shares her first name — and now the real Kim is out for revenge.  —  It's all over the “Kinky Kim Filthy Love Doll” …

Magician David Blaine expecting first child  —  Tweet  —  David Blaine will perform his most amazing trick yet and turn himself into a father next year.  At a recent rooftop cancer benefit hosted by ASmallWorld.com mogul Patrick Liotard-Vogt, the illusionist/endurance expert gushed …

‘Bird’ in the hand  —  Tweet  —  Nicole Kidman's returning to Broadway, clothed.  —  The actress will star in a revival of Tennessee Williams' “Sweet Bird of Youth” next fall.  The director is David Cromer, who won glowing reviews for last year's off-Broadway production of “Our Town.”

Paz de la Huerta Really Wants You To See Her Tattoo  —  Paz de la Huerta's one goal at the Boardwalk Empire premiere in Atlantic City, NJ last night was to make sure that every camera and every set of eyes got a peek at the stupid snake tattoo crawling up her ankle.

‘40-Year-Old Virgin’ actor convicted of stabbing ex-girlfriend  —  An actor best known for his supporting role in the movie “The 40-Year-Old Virgin” was convicted Thursday for the 2008 stabbing of an ex-girlfriend in San Marcos.  —  The jury in San Diego County Superior Court in Vista …

Big & Rich's Big Kenny Adopts a Son  —  Big Kenny's family just got a little bigger with the addition of a new son, Dakota Jefferson Holiday Alphin, adopted by the Big & Rich singer and his wife, Christiev, in July.  —  “When they put Dakota in our arms, he has the most beautiful smile …

Britney Spears Takes Her Boys Back To School Shopping  —  Britney Spears took her young sons Sean Preston and Jayden James to the Topanga Mall in Woodland Hills yesterday afternoon, and the happy family (plus a small army of security guards) spent about two hours shopping at the monstrous center.